8/13/2006

Impersonation

Here are a few personalities (?) I would like to impersonate for at least a short while.

Himesh Reshamiya:

I want to learn how exactly it feels like to eat, sleep and shit with my nose.

Also, I would like to remove my cap and look at my hair in the mirror for a while, and find out the reason to why I can’t show my hair to others.

I would also like to sleep with women 20 years younger.

Simon Taufel:

I would like to trip Shoaib Akhtar when he bowls, with the hope that he becomes a spin bowler consequently.

Arjun Singh:

I would want to do a few addition sums to see if I get them right. I would also want to shoot myself after that, and write a suicide note saying I killed myself as I was not able to solve 69 - 73.

Jayalalitha:

I would love to pose a challenge to Deccan Chronicle, by having dinner with Adnan Sami, get a photograph with him, and see if the photo fits the first page next day. I would also want to sit on Dayanidhi Maran.

Rahul Dravid:

I would want to tell Dhoni that he looks good only when he’s dirty.

A ball boy in Wimbledon:

I would also like to see more than usual of Sharapova.

Amelie Mauresmo:

I want to have good biceps.

M.F. Hussain:

I want to make a drawing of the Indian Flag with a Nataraj Pencil and sell it for 1 million rupees.

Madonna:

I would want to kiss Britney Spears in public, and do it proudly.

Fabien Barthez:

I would want to know what it feels like to jump up in the air with my legs on the ground.

Udita Goswami:

I would like to go and stand in front of a German shepherd, and check if it mistakes me for an enlarged cat and chases me. Only that if it does, I can’t run.

Kavya Vishwanathan:

I would like to explain clearly to the world that Tamilians are extremely ethical, of which Amma and I (Kavya) are the only exceptions.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

MF husain and Udita goswami were good.
you're an amma-hater?

CB said...

Umm, not exactly. But I don't like here either :-)

Mohan K.V said...

Kaavya Vishwanathan, you bet man!

Anonymous said...

lolz. makes fully tp reading. enjoyed it!!

Anonymous said...

y'know, i once watched this ballet on tv called 'the cunning little vixen'.
udita goswami reminds me of the woman who played the vixen. only, the other woman had makeup on.
as for kaavya vishwanathan..... even after all the ctrlC-ctrlV, the novel reads like a b-grade one. if you can't write novels, you can't write novels. no two ways about it.

Anonymous said...

Dayanidhi isn't that mal-nourished either.
Kaavya,:D ya_ya
Amma is God da.She is dynamic to dynamite da.A she-Roark actually.



Good one.

Anonymous said...

yet again...another good post.....

Anonymous said...

Though you haven't impersonated her (Kavya Viswanathan), you did stoop down to her level by erm...er..shall we say lifting something straight out of Kini's blog...call it "Fact Actually Part 2" if you wish..

CB said...

Ok da macha.
Don't burn.

Anonymous said...

I would also like to sleep with women 20 years younger.
YEAOUCH! You're 20. I hope you didn't mean 0-year-old women.

Nice "spin the bowler" pun.

As for Madonna, it is interesting that almost no one speaks of her kissing Christina Aguilera. (The whole 5-minute-long video.) If the stupid cameraperson hadn't switched to capture Justin Timberlake's reaction after the first one, the world might have had both those kisses instead of one-and-a-half (and apparently, some are even jealous !)
Britney:Christina :: Hiroshima:Nagasaki -- no one talks about the second bomb.

As for Kaavya, if you can't write novels, you can still become famous and sell well. Just take a look at
(*wears asbestos underwear*)
Dan Brown or Chetan Bhagat

CB said...

Vatsa! I knew you would ask that!
Of course, I didn't mean I wanted to see how it is to sleep with 0 yr olds!

As for that video, :)

Anonymous said...

Terrific blog! I should wish you luck for chosen career on impersonation. Oh by the way, please don't forget to post your experiences while your on duty.

all or nothing said...

=)) =)) =))
I've come to the conclusion that reading your blog in public places can cause serious damage :D

bharath said...

hehehe.

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